Dream Dream Dream Dream

I was thinking about that song as I was trying to blog again today. I have to get my thoughts out because I forget them so fast! I have the strangest dreams. Wow, they even shake me up sometimes. I am sure it is all the medicine I am on! Sunday night I dreamt I was with my family (kids and grand kids) and we were swimming in the ocean. Of course everyone started to drown and they all climbed on me ( I am very buoyant) and I was trying to save everyone. We were all sinking under the water and I was confused and couldn't figure out the top from the bottom, so I looked what I thought was up and I saw a huge light so headed for the light and saved us all! Yeah! Well, as I was trying to analyze this dream I decided as parent's we all want what is best for our family. What is the most important thing to a mom or dad? Well for me it is that all my family knows Jesus and has a personal relationship with Him. So to me this was telling me that everyday I need to be the mom and grandma God wants me to be so my family will see Jesus in me. Some days that may be harder to see than others so I need to work on that every day. Some days when I feel deep in my "valley" I don't show the light like I need to so another thing that shows me I am not perfect, I need all the love and forgiveness I can get this side of Heaven!
Last night my dream was very different. I have become aware of a new drug that could possibly change my life. It is very new. Lots of decisions to be made. So my prayer has been every day " God show me what to do." So my dream last night was I was watching my funeral. My friend Bev was the pastor, she did a good job! Of course there was humor, she knew I would have to have humor. My sister in law was in the kitchen taking care of the lunch. I always said my lunch had to be just blizzards, but Elaine was making sandwiches and coffee and with Elaine she was breaking dishes right and left so they kicked her out of the kitchen. They said she was going to cost more money than the church could afford so she had to leave. Anyway back to the funeral I was sitting up high my mom and dad on both sides of me and my grandpa and my mother in law was right there. We were watching what everyone was doing. As I was watching this I noticed my grandchildren. They were having a horrible time. I remember losing a parent at a young age and it does something to you. It rocks your world as you knew it. Losing a parent at 40 does something to you too. It is the natural progression as we know it, but it leaves an empty spot in your family circle. I had my answer, OK God I will wait. Some days I don't feel so needed and feel like a burden to others through this "valley" but I am here. Thank you God I can see my family when I want to. I can chat with them on the phone. Even my one year old grandaughter is chatting with me on the phone. I love hearing all their voices on the other end. How do they steal your heart so much? I will wait. Wait until God shows me it is time. But another thing that struck me was how the church wasn't full. How silly is that? I again was analyzing this dream ( no I am not a professional) and decided how many lives have I touched? How many people's lives have I made a difference in? How many times did I say the right thing to someone that they will remember me or how many times did I say the thing that could make them not want to remember me? Yes, we have a lot of work to do on this Earth. I am so thankful for all the people in my life that have touched me I pray I can re pay the favor to all of them!